Earlier on my blog, I shared a message titled “Wired for Sex”. But I like to share a similar message under this title.
Many consider sex evil, and in the majority is believers. After hearing “don’t fornicate” for an average of two decades of their lives, most believers enter marriage still with a notion that sex is evil. Because the only Word of God they heard on sex until they got married was DON’T.
So even in marriage, some women subconsciously see sex as a secret sin. We, as a Church or as Christian couples, don’t even know how to celebrate sex as a precious gift from God. Christian couples are sometimes shy to discuss sex. And the lights are always turned off during sex between them. Because they are shy and wouldn’t want to see each other enjoy this “secret sin”. If you are not yet married and have lived a chaste life until now, you may be surprised at these. But this is real. Some couples feel less spiritual after having sex. And more spiritual when they avoid sex. What is the reason? It is because for the most part of their learning years, sex was a forbidden crime. Their minds have accepted strongly, that to please God, you must not have sex.
Hmmm. Paul therefore prophesied of a time that celibacy will be counted as the best way to please God, and Christian religion will forbid marriage. Strange as this prophecy sounds, it is happening in many marriages. Many believers marry, still thinking that celibacy makes them purer than physical and sexual intimacy.
Maybe today, we are all the Church presbytery and I’m speaking to us as pastors and leaders. The solution to this is that apart from the negative (don’t fornicate etc), the Church must also be positive and teach us at a point that SEX IS A BLESSING GOD GAVE TO BE ENJOYED IN MARRIAGE. Sex is not sin, though there is sexual immorality. Sexual immorality is sin because it is a perverted use or rather abuse of the gift of sex. But sex is not sin. Sex is a blessing.
When we teach sex in the Light of the Word, sexual abuse will be on the low in the Church. I still haven’t written the Sex 101 message yet. But the initial topic I wrote for this message was SEX IN MY VEINS. That will be our SEX 101 message for today.
When you teach that Sex is a blessing our Father spoke over us in marriage, then wives can seduce their husbands and sex can be spiritual moment. Never a carnal one! When we teach that Sex is a blessing from God, then the pastor doesn’t see his wife as a temptation when he is in a fasting period. He doesn’t think that the lesser sex he has with his wife, the more spiritual he is. He doesn’t see romance as profanity.
When we teach that Sex is a blessing in marriage, then we can accept that our musicians make romantic scripture censored love songs that can be played in our bedrooms. We will save our intimate times from the Celine Dions.
We will save our husbands who might have been saved from a sexually promiscuous past from thinking that the wives are boring in bed. We will see sex as a sacred and pure blessing in marriage.
We will also see, that abusing sex is very dangerous because of its powerful nature. We will love sex but fear fornication and adultery, just like we love rain and water but fear and avoid flood. And just like we love fire because it bakes the bread, but we hate fire outbreaks, because they burn the bakers. Sex isn’t sin. But Sex outside marriage is. Sex is a blessing you should thank God for, even as you look forward to getting married.
Pious D. Serwonu
Written for the Sex Conference.